Gephyrophillia #218

Originally Posted on 11/30/2009 by Jeff Harris

Time Warner is the most poorly run, uncooperative, disconnected entertainment company in the world. And after next week's spinoff of AOL (sorry, Aol), they're going to be flush with more money than they know what to do with, combined with the funds they got earlier from spinning off their cable systems. Instead of utilizing those funds to strengthen the brands and properties that remain in place, Time Warner will probably do what any warm-blooded American would do if given brand new money all at once.

They're going shopping.

Yeah, the company claims that they're not in a rush to buy anything, and despite media rumors, they didn't go after NBC Universal, but as soon as they can actually count the funds in their hands and they see what's available, then it'll be a different story. Right now, there are plenty of companies out there that are either in dire straits or rumored to be for sale. And there's a few companies that have thrown out there by various media outlets over the past couple of weeks that could become potential units of Time Warner. So the question is what kind of company would become a target of the Watertower?

4Kids Entertainment

Why They Would Buy 4Kids Entertainment: 4Kids is literally the face of non-E/I entertainment on broadcast television. They operate the Saturday morning lineup on The CW (a venture co-owned by Time Warner) and has made a mark on the lineup by bringing action-packed shows weekly. With 4Kids, Time Warner can tap into the tween demographic that aren't connected to Nickelodeon and Disney Channel, which the company has maintained for much of the decade. Plus, the licensing division of Time Warner could get a boost from 4Kids with the company overseeing many properties ranging from video game icons to classic brands.

Why They Wouldn't Buy 4Kids Entertainment: Because 4Kids is a broken company. After they lost the best-known property in their arsenal, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, ti Viacom, all 4Kids has is Chaotic, certain rights to Yu-Gi-Oh that aren't owned by Viz, and distribution/merchandising rights to other properties as well as the 4Kids.tv portal. 4Kids is a licensing company. Time Warner already has that. They also have numerous web video portals for their children's entertainment properties, particularly Kids' WB and Cartoon Network. 4Kids is falling apart before our eyes, and I doubt Time Warner would want to buy them out.

Classic Media

Why They Would Buy Classic Media: To refresh your mind, the New York-based company formerly known as Boomerang Media owns the Filmation library, Postman Pat, Big Ideas Entertainment, Harvey Entertainment, Rocky and Bullwinkle, Underdog, Lassie, UPA, the classic Rankin/Bass titles not owned by Time Warner, and other properties. Classic Media has numerous intellectual properties that could be embraced and reintroduced by the various units of Time Warner. Some Classic Media properties, particularly Gerald McBoing-Boing, George of the Jungle, and Casper, have recently been a part of Cartoon Network's lineup, and it's possible that new productions featuring characters like Rocky and Bullwinkle, Underdog, The Lone Ranger, Richie Rich, and others could arise. Harvey characters could return to comics as could characters like Solar: Man of the Atom, Magnus: Robot Fighter, and Turok: Dinosaur Hunter (well, they're already returning to comics, but these characters could find their way into the expanding DC Universe). Classic Media is one of those companies with built-in fans but with limited audience reach, something Time Warner could expand if they controlled the unit outright.

Why They Shouldn't Buy Classic Media: Time Warner tend to treat older properties rather shabbily these days. Until recently, Looney Tunes rarely aired on American television. The Hanna-Barbera characters that aren't Tom and Jerry, The Flintstones, and Scooby-Doo are largely forgotten by and unknown to today's audiences. A company that is filled with older properties like Classic Media would be largely seen as a group that has access to a few properties that could be harnessed and revamped for newer projects and a library that would be shuttered completely. They could bolster the Boomerang channel, but overall, would be seen as a tiny intellectual property division of a huge entertainment company.

Metro-Goldwyn-Meyer

Why They Would Buy MGM: The Wizard of Oz. Gone With The Wind. Boys Town. A Night At The Opera. The Pride of the Yankees. Singin' In The Rain. Jailhouse Rock. The Dirty Dozen. A bunch of MGM films not owned by MGM, but rather Time Warner. They also own Tom and Jerry, Flipper, and other MGM television properties. So, it would be natural for Time Warner to make the pitch to buy the struggling movie studio. In fact, Time Warner could rebuild the MGM brand as a prestige label, not unlike Disney's Miramax label. They could also utilize the entire library across all their channels as well as become a valuable part of MGM's stake in ThisTV. Oh, and it can't hurt Time Warner to have James Bond, Rocky, Stargate, American Gladiators, The Pink Panther, The OUter Limits, Silence of the Lambs, Barbershop, Bill and Ted, The Addams Family, and others in their portfolio.

Why They Shouldn't Buy MGM: While it would be nice of Time Warner to own the Lion lock, stock, and barrel, they don't really need it. MGM's roar isn't as loud as it used to be, and to be honest, it would largely be seen as a minor studio connected to a major studio. Time Warner has already turned New Line into a smaller studio, and they'd probably do the same to MGM. In the end, the only thing of worth to come out of MGM would be the library itself. Perhaps Time Warner should talk to their former Vice-Chairman, Ted Turner, about the worth of MGM's library. After all, he bought the best stuff that came from MGM with him to Time Warner many moons ago.

Lions Gate Films

Why They Would Buy LGF: Lionsgate is one of the fastest-growing entertainment companies in the world. Time Warner already has a relationship with the studio through its TBS network, which has a multi-series deal with the studio. Plus, Warner Bros. could help bring LGF's Mad Men, Weeds, and Crash to more international markets. The film division is as eclectic as you can get, ranging from dramas to cult hits to horror/genre flicks. Lionsgate is a part owner of Epix and planning to enter the music industry, an industry that Time Warner really doesn't have a part in these days (though to be fair, Willams Street Records, responsible for many Adult Swim soundracks and indy recordings, is the lone music label owned by Time Warner today). They're slowly becoming a powerhouse in entertainment.

Why They Shouldn't Buy LGF: Time Warner owns New Line Cinema. New Line was the Lions Gate Films of its time during the period where they released the Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Critters, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Friday, Poison Ivy, House Party, Blade, Rush Hour, Final Destination, Austin Powers, and The Lord of the Rings films as well as the flicks of John Walters. Lionsgate is technically an independent studio like what New Line used to be, so why would Time Warner spend money on a studio that has output just like New Line? It's counterproductive.

Viacom

Why They Would Buy Viacom: Nickelodeon. Spike. Comedy Central. Paramount Pictures. MTV. These are huge worldwide brands (well, Spike isn't), and more successful in a lot of areas that Time Warner isn't. If you don't count Paramount Pictures, Viacom is largely a cable company with outlets that, with the exception of the current direction of Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon, rarely interconnect with the other Time Warner units. The New York Post started the rumor that Time Warner could make a bid for National Amusements' Viacom unit (little known fact to much of the general public: National Amusements owns majority stakes in the two companies that once comprised the larger Viacom, CBS and the "new" Viacom). In a sense, it'd be a homecoming for Nickelodeon, MTV, and Comedy Central as Time Warner and its precursor companies owned a significant stake in all of those networks at one point in their lives. Plus, the interconnectivity between the Viacom and Warner Bros. libraries, Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network possibly working together instead of against each other, and the potential to expand their properties beyond what's out there are limitless.

Why They Shouldn't Buy Viacom: Viacom's a big company and a competing company at that. It's not going to happen despite what the New York Post thinks. There's no real reason for Viacom to put itself up for sale, and there's no real reason for Time Warner to buy one of their biggest competitor. That said, the lone reason for them not to buy Viacom is Paramount Pictures. Paramount is just as big as Warner Bros., and could create a power struggle of sorts in the end. Paramount is probably THE deal breaker, even more so than Nickelodeon.

Do I think Time Warner will go on a shopping spree? I doubt it. I think they'll eventually buy something smaller in 2010, but I don't think they'll make a massive acquisition ever again. But stranger things have happened. Heck, nobody expected Marvel to be bought by Disney, did they?

*end transmission*

Jeff Harris,
Creator/Webmaster, The X Bridge