Gephyrophillia #228

Originally Posted on 03/23/2011 by Jeff Harris

Fear not. Another hole in the continuity of The X Bridge, so, another new article to fill it. Enjoy. - jh

I’ve realized why I haven’t updated The X Bridge for a while now.

I’ve learned that I’m absolutely wrong all the time. At least that’s the vibe I get from folks around me and the feedback from people that tend to read the scrawlings of someone considered a relic of a by-gone era.

I’m on the wrong side of the nearly every major issue. On the discussion of the new Looney Tunes show coming to Cartoon Network , I’m clearly on the wrong side because I actually support its creation and look forward to it. I’m some kind of weirdo because those that want to damn it and everybody involved to hell seem to be so prominent in the forums and such. And I’m obviously crazy and wrong in wanting to see someone put their interpretations of characters created more than 70 years ago.

When it comes to the animated films of Pixar, I’m definitely in the wrong for feeling that every movie they make isn’t the greatest animated film ever made ever. When I say that Wall-E was just okay, Up was a bit uneven, or Toy Story 3 was The Brave Little Toaster with toys, people see me as someone who’s not only wrong, but also someone who threw mud on a white sofa. How dare I criticize Pixar and their great, great films! Why do I have to be hatin’ on Pixar? Why do I have a bizarre axe to grind against Pixar? It’s not that at all. I’m just not of the school that every Pixar film is a masterpiece. They’re brilliant, mind you, but every story has the same framing sequence: Arrogant/anxious character threatened by newcomer/not belonging in a situation, find themselves lost in trying to get out of that threatening place, finds a guide to help them get back to a more comfortable face and a foe determined to keep them far away from that comfortable place, a chase sequence, and a saccharine ending that pulls on your heartstrings.

That’s the Pixar formula. I cracked it. Might be wrong there too.

I’m also wrong about feeling that Japanese animation like Pokemon, Bakugan, Beyblade, and Yu-Gi-Oh are anime titles, because every otaku under the sun say that they’re not. I’m wrong for thinking that they’re not anime titles because they’ve been edited and neutered so much that they’re now American shows only. I say something I think is witty at the time like “If you neuter a dog, it doesn’t become a cat,” but that falls on deaf ears because to them, apparently if you do neuter a dog, it meows rather than barks.

Oh, and don’t get me started on other things. I’ve called Time Warner the most poorly-ran entertainment company on the planet, and yet, I’ve been proven wrong all the time. For starters, NBC Universal’s pretty bad (that whole Conan/Leno situation was proof of their ineptitude) as is Viacom (it’s bad enough when they accused YouTube of copyright infringement, but it’s another when Viacom infringes on the copyrights of YouTube users themselves). Admittedly, I really was way off about Time Warner being the most poorly-ran entertainment company on the planet. They’ve gotten better. It’s those two idiots trying to transform Cartoon Network into Not Cartoon Network that soured by view of the company. The situation’s better now than it was when I initially made that statement.

I guess what I’m saying is that if you like what you read here, you probably shouldn’t, especially since so many people say I’m wrong for having these opinions. But you know what? I’m okay being wrong or at least getting people saying that I’m wrong.

That’s proof that they’re actually listening to what I have to say.

Keep creating.

Jeff Harris,
Creator/Webmaster, The X Bridge.